| At A Glance | |
| Author | wolfbane |
| Contact | wolfbane@bme.anon |
| IAM | wolfbane |
| When | Three months ago |
| Artist | Shaun |
| Studio | Pleasure or Pain Productions |
| Location | Aberdare, South Wales |
For those of you who've never been, the Eden Project is a mammoth conservation project. There are different domes which hold different kinds of plants, an educational area and various outdoor exhibits. One of those exhibits caught my eye; a collection of different kinds of trees and the stories told about them in myth and legend. I've been interested in the stories people and cultures tell for years, and the idea that different kinds of trees had different religious meaning, different properties and different uses has always fascinated me, so I spent a good while wandering around, reading the different tags on the different trees and generally soaking up the rather peaceful atmosphere. And that's where the main ideas for my next tattoo were formed.
As I said earlier, I've always been interested in the stories we have about trees. They're such an integral part of our (humanity's) history and our (different tribes') culture. Without trees there'd be no fire, no initial exploration of other worlds, no entries to the underworld. I read Neil Gaiman's Sandman series a couple of years, as well as Mike Carey's Lucifer a bit more recently, and both of these stories dealt with different stories, some of which were invariably linked to trees. It was while reading Lucifer that I came across an illustration which really caught my eye; a tree whose leaves are stars (you really have to see it to see how good it is, For those who are interested it's Lucifer book nine, The Wolf Beneath The Tree). I really loved that image and began thinking about how I could convert that to a tattoo, or more specifically, a half sleeve.
Of course, as happens, other things got in the way. Me and my ex split up, I changed jobs and couldn't afford to get any mods for a while, and while I still thought about my half sleeve I wasn't in a position to get anything done.
And then I went to the Eden Project and the idea was rekindled again.
While I was walking around the tree exhibit I was trying to work out what I wanted. I loved the idea of the tree I'd seen in Lucifer, but while I liked the idea that it represented in the story I wanted something that had a bit more meaning to me. My chest tattoo has the Celtic symbol for protection entwined with three crescent moons (symbolic of the maiden, mother and crone often seen in paganism); I wear a pentacle around my neck; my background and country's history is steeped in folklore (the tylwyth teg and Gwyn ap Nudd); the list could go on. I wanted something that reflected those beliefs. Something that represented who I am and where I'm from.
So my research began in earnest.
I started by looking through the mythology books that I owned to see if I could find stories containing trees. I was looking specifically for Celtic stories, and trees related to the UK and Welsh mythology. The books I had were interesting, but didn't give a lot of information. One of the books I had which described history, mythology, magical use and other titbits of information focussed on herbs, which wasn't quite what I was looking for. So I broadened my search to the internet. I did come across a variety of websites detailing the mythological use of trees, but not all of the information found on the web is reliable and I wanted to make sure my research was correct. I found quite a few sites which were of interest, but found myself more often than not returning to these two sites and Wikipedia, to try to confirm what I'd read elsewhere on the web.
While I was doing this research the tattoo idea was growing in my mind. Initially I'd considered just getting the top half of my right arm tattooed, but as the research grew so did the idea, and my innate love of symmetry really did mean that I needed to get both my left and right arms tattooed. This brought on another quandary. If I was getting a tree on both arms, did I want the same tree and same design, or did I want the same tree in a different design, or two different designs but both including trees?
The former would have a certain symmetry about it, but the same design on both arms would, I felt, take away the meaning of the tattoo somewhat. The latter; different designs, but both including trees, might have been more difficult as I wasn't sure if I wanted two different designs, no matter how similar the theme was. Which really left the middle option; the same tree but with a different design, but again I wasn't really sure about that one either.
As I debated the ideas I continued with the research. I did have a couple of ideas as to what tree I wanted, but I really wanted to make sure it was the right tree for the design, and the right design for the tree (you can see that I was still working on very sketchy details at this point). The trees I was considering incorporating into the tattoo were the rowan, the oak, the ash and the yew. All of these trees had a particular significance to me and I really wasn't sure which I wanted to use.
The rowan is a tree that I've always liked. It's the tree associated with the month of my birthday (February) and one of it's common names is the mountain ash also the name of a village in the Cynon Valley, not far from where I grew up. The rowan is also often called The Wizard Tree or The Witch Tree, partly because rowan berries have a small pentagram at the point where they are joined to the stalk. The period of time connected to the rowan is also associated with the coming of new life out of the dark winter something that would be quite fitting for a later design of the tattoo.
The oak, however, is possibly one of the most important (if not the most important) trees in Celtic mythology. Knowing that made it quite hard to reject the oak as a tree that I could use in my tattoo. Its uses are varied, from being used in spells for protection, strength, success and stability, healing and fertility to being used as boundary markers. I've climbed oak trees, and had them in my garden, as a child, and they do seem like old protectors of times long past. Oak Trees also symbolised the turning of the year; a time when the sun starts his movement into darkness and is sacrificed to darkness as the earth begins to move back into winter.
The ash, along with the oak, is one of the three scared trees in Celtic mythology. It's linked to the third month of the year, and so spring and is sacred to Odin (which links back to Neil Gaiman as Odin was a key character in American Gods). It's also often known as the Yggdrassil, the tree that supports the universe and sprang from the beginning of time. In Celtic mythology the ash is known as the tree of enchantment and it's said the Welsh magician Gwydion fashioned his wands from ash wood. The ash tree then was another that I couldn't ignore if I wanted a tattoo that would represent me and my beliefs.
Lastly, I thought of the yew tree. Another famous tree throughout different mythologies, the yew is known as the tree of death and is associated with winter. Yew trees are often found in graveyards, sacred to many of the darker goddesses, and Shakespeare even recognized the relationship of Yew and Hecate, referred to the herb in both Macbeth and Hamlet: "slips of yew, silver'd in the moon's eclipse..." and "hebenon, the double-fatal yew".
So there were my four trees, and I had a difficult decision to make. Each tree had some significance for me and the tattoo, but I've only got two arms so could only choose two trees. On top of symbolism though, I also needed a tree that looked good and would fit with my arm. So, armed with Google, I looked up images of each tree to see if I could find what I was looking for.
And I did. The rowan, while I tree that I love, was too small. The proportions wouldn't fit with the tattoo. The oak I wasn't sure about not because of its aesthetic appeal, but because it somehow didn't fit with what I wanted; the symbolism was off somehow (and I can't make it any clearer that that it was just something I knew wouldn't be right on my arm). Which left the ash and the yew. The images I'd Googled were just right for my arms, not too big but not too small. The symbolism of the two linked perfectly with what I wanted the tattoo to represent, and the trees also stood for the beginning and the end of the year spring and winter, and birth and death.
And there it was; my tattoo, almost complete. I had the symbols, I had the images. All I needed now was to put it together.
While I'd been doing the research for the tattoo, the image of what I wanted it to look like had grown in my mind. From being a rough, sketchy idea it turned into a fully formed design, encompassing my beliefs, my background and the tattoos I already had.
Across my shoulders I have the text "In darkness I will find you giving up inside like me". I've written before that I find this optimistic more than pessimistic and it gives me some element of hope rather than making me despair. I thought that this tattoo would work well with the two half sleeves I now had planned. The left arm would be my 'spring arm' the sky would be a spring dawn, the tree would be in bloom and life would be beginning. In contrast the right arm would be my 'winter arm' the sky would be a winter twilight with a full moon and stars in the sky; the tree's branches would be bare with a solitary bird resting on them. Life would be at an end. Joining them would be the text on my shoulders, creating a branch between spring and winter, life and death, and the passage of time that all of us inevitably have to endure. More than that though, the tattoos would by symbolic of the cyclical nature of the world; spring follows winter and turns into summer, which becomes autumn and again winter. In much the same way we go through highs and lows, think that something is an end when it's really a beginning. The passage of the seasons, the stream of life, all this would be reflected on me, and in me.
The next step, once all the groundwork was complete, was to get in touch with my tattoo artist. I was planning to go back to Aberdare, to see Shaun who's done most of my previous tattoos. At home one weekend I popped into the studio for a quick chat. I was greeted with a "Hiya Beth, haven't seen you for a while," (in fact about a year), and after a quick chat about how we both were and how business was going, I explained what I wanted.
Shaun rolled up my sleeve and looked critically at my arms. I have a line of runic text running around both arms, about a third of the way up from the elbow, and I could see Shaun working out how he could fit that into the design I'd (sketchily) outlined.
"So what're we looking at? Starting about there [he pointed to an area about a centimetre about my elbow] and going to about there [he pointed to the top of my shoulder]? And what about them [the runes], we covering them up?"
"Pretty much, except I still want the runes. I'm thinking pretty much a half sleeve though I really want to work on it with you rather than just give you a picture and have you copy it. What do you think?"
"Aye, I reckon we'll come up with something. Send me an email with a couple of ideas and we'll book yourself in for the first session."
And that was that. I booked myself in for 7th July and headed back to Bath, thoughts of what I'd put in the email running through my mind. I'd saved some of the pictures I'd looked at on Google to my computer, so when I got home put together a somewhat garbled email to Shaun and attached the pictures. So what did I say in the email?
I think this might be a bit of a jumbled email but I'll try and make it make sense! Some of the pictures I've attached because I like the way the tree flows with the lines of the body (tree_flow and celtic_tree). Others I've attached because the tree is similar to the ones I want on my arms (right_tree1, 2 and 3 and left_tree).
I can't remember if I mentioned it to you, but I'm trying to work in elements of Celtic and paganism into the tattoos. The left arm I want to have a theme of birth/spring (that's the dawn arm) and the right I want to have a theme of death/winter (the twilight arm). I've been thinking about having some buds and leaves on the branches of the tree on the left arm, and bare branches with only a few leaves, and a crow or raven (the way the bird sits in the crow_tree I really like) sitting in the tree on the right arm. How possible that'll be though I'm not sure..?
In keeping with the death/winter theme I was also thinking of having some gravestones, or even just standing stones, under the tree on the right arm (right_tree3 sparked that idea) but the problem there is that it might come across as being too goth/emo/depressing/whatever.
I'm not sure though how much Celtic symbolism I want in there - maybe you could give me your opinion on that? I really like the celtic_tree tattoo, and was thinking maybe of getting some knotwork around the sleeves, but I also really like the kinda free flowing designs where there's no border between the tattoo and the bare skin (does that make sense?)...I quite like the ideas in the tree11 tattoo, but don't want the symbolism to be as obvious - basically I don't want deer sitting in the branches unless they're really discreet deer that look like branches.
I guess the other problem with that is that I ideally want these to be half sleeves, not just a big tattoo on the 'outside' of my arm, and I don't know how well any definite Celtic pattern, with border, would work with the sleeves, if that makes sense?
I've got some ideas of the colouring I want for the tattoo (pretty much greyscale apart from the sky, and I've got some images of what I'd like the skies to look like which I can email to you again if you need them) but I'll leave that til another time - think this might be enough info for one email!
Hopefully this'll have given you a bit of an idea of what I'd like to do with the sleeves. I'm sorry if it's really jumbled, and I hope that it's not too detailed a tattoo idea which is way over the top and one you consider completely undoable.
Basically if we can work something out together I'd be happier doing that than just giving you a design and asking you to copy it, if that makes sense and you're happy doing. Let me know what you think of the ideas, and what will and won't work. I can always come back up to Aberdare and call into the studio too if that'll make it easier at any point (I can also bring biscuits!).
A couple of days later I got a reply. "Downloaded the pics, I'll have a potch and see what I come up with. Shit hot."
Sorted.
That was in April, and by the time the middle of June rolled around I'd found another house to move into. The trouble was my moving in date was 7th July. There was no way I'd be able to get a 3 hour tattoo done and move house, 80 miles apart in the space of 24 hours. Reluctantly I rang Shaun to postpone the appointment, settling on 19th July instead.
"How's the design coming along?"
"Yeah it's looking good. I thought we'd start on the right arm first, the winter one. I've used that nice tree, you know, the one with the leaves. It's looking great. See you in a few weeks"
By this point, to be completely honest, I was getting worried that I hadn't seen the design. I'd sent the idea to Shaun back in April, and while I trusted his ability as an artist this was the first time I'd really collaborated with him on a project rather than turning up at the studio with the idea on paper. I also wasn't too sure about using just one tree as I'd initially wanted two, but I'd ummed and ahhed about that so much over the last couple of months I wasn't sure what I really wanted. Seeing the design he'd drawn up would have made me less anxious, but it seemed a bit late to say that now. I'd just have to wait for the 19th.
I'd like the say the 19th dawned bright and sunny, but given summer so far in this country it was probably raining. Nevertheless I made my way down to the studio, copies of the email and pictures I'd sent to Shaun and Harry Potter number 5 in my bag. I was in this for the ling haul, and with the release of the final book only days away figured I'd get a bit of reading done while Shaun worked. I arrived at the studio a bit early and hung around outside until Clair, the piercer, arrived. She greeted me in her usual chirpy way, invited me in and offered me a cuppa while I waited for Shaun. Luckily I didn't have too long to wait. I was in the middle of filling in the standard pre-tattoo declaration when the door opened and Shaun walked in, baseball cap on as usual.
He said hello and headed for the door to the studio, telling me he'd be out in a sec with the design he'd drawn up. This was it. There wasn't really any going back now the design was there and I'd be seeing it in moments. Nerves were flittering through my stomach. What if I hated it? What if it was nothing like I'd imagined? How on earth could I tell him that he'd have to change it all after the work he'd put in? As if to build the suspense, and my nerves, even more, Shaun came back out with one of the initial images I'd sent him.
"This is the one I used," he said. "Just as a basis for the tree."
I nodded, impatiently wondering where the tattoo was.
"And this is what I've come up with. What do you think?"
He put a sheet of paper in front of me and my jaw dropped. Somehow, from the garbled email I'd sent him all those months ago, he'd created an absolutely stunning piece of art. He'd taken the ideas I'd given him and combined them so they created a bleak winter landscape, complete with bare tree, raven and cracked gravestones with mountains looming in the background. I was speechless. In fact I think the only thing I was capable of uttering were the words "Fucking hell..."
"You like it then?" He asked, grinning.
"It's amazing. It's just. Bloody hell. Amazing."
Right, I'll start getting ready and I'll give you a shout in ten mins."
I think I must have spent the next ten minutes, until Shaun called me into the back of the studio, in a daze. He's ferried the drawing off with him so he could copy it onto a stencil, but the image just danced around in my head and I couldn't stop grinning. My artist was a total genius. He knew exactly what I wanted and I couldn't wait for the tattooing, all 3 hours of it, to start.
My one remaining concern though, albeit a small one, was how my runic text would fit in with the new tattoo. I'd half thought that the runes would sit in the branches, but the trees I'd chosen, and Shaun's design, make that impossible. But that problem was soon solved, as I sat in the studio's chair and watched as Shaun prepped my arm.
He'd cut around the bulk of the tattoo so that the paper fitted perfectly on my arm, and between the branches of the tree and the roots was a gap, in which the runes sat perfectly. He carefully ripped a chunk of about half an inch out of the tree trunk then positioned the paper carefully on my arm. Sitting back and giving it a critical appraisal he told me to look in the mirror. The positioning of the tattoo was perfect, but it seemed a bit top heavy. The branches ran up to my shoulder, but there were few roots at the base of my arm, so Shaun drew some on and voila perfect tattoo.
The preparation done, I sat back in my chair, Pink Floyd on the CD player. Shaun picked up the tattoo machine, and the outlining began. It had been a while since I'd been tattooed last, but it felt like it was yesterday as the familiar drone of the machine filled the room. I watched as Shaun started at the base of the tree, outlining the roots and carefully wiping off the blood, before moving further up the tree. I watched him for about quarter of an hour, singing along to the music, but there's only so much tattooing you can watch before it all becomes the same, so I retrieved Harry Potter from my bag and started reading.
The bulk of the tattoo was easy to take. I've got several tattoos and, not trying to sound blasι, I'm used to them. The worst part for me was being sat in the same position, unable to move, for 3 hours. I'd try not to fidget but after the first hour or so my back was starting to really ache, and sensing my discomfort (or at least noticing my attempts to stretch without moving) Shaun suggested I stand up, take a look in the mirror and have a stretch. It was really nice to see the tattoo taking shape. I'd not looked at it for a good 45 minutes or so and it was taking shape nicely. Stretch over, I sat back down and the tattooing resumed.
It carried on much the same way until it came to tattooing the underside of my arm. I've not been tattooed there before the runes stop before the really sensitive skin, so it was a definite experience. It was painful, but more a high pitched kind of pain than the normal background pain you get used to when you're being tattooed. It wasn't unbearable by any means, but it was annoying and distracted me once or twice from Harry Potter.
Another hour or so passed and again it was time to take a break and stretch. Clair had popped in once or twice to see how I was doing or ask Shaun a question, and as I stood there admiring the two thirds complete tattoo in the mirror, she popped her head round the door again.
"How's it coming?" She asked.
I turned around so I was facing her and watched as she examined the tattoo.
"He's good isn't he." She said, and I had to agree. Shaun's one of the best artists I know of, and certainly the one I'm happiest having work on me. He's done most of my tattoos and will be doing more in the future, and I said so to Clair. She took a step backwards and examined me and the other tattoos I have.
"You know, you're really good at deciding what you want. Every tattoo you've got suits you really well, and they look amazing."
With that she wandered back into the shop, leaving me and Shaun feeling rather pleased with ourselves.
The last hour did take its toll a bit though. My arm had become pretty sensitive from being tattooed, and having the blood and ink wiped off, to the point where I was really looking forward to being able to go home and wash it in lovely lukewarm water. As I was gritting my teeth, Wish you Were Here started, and I really found myself connecting with the lyrics getting tattooed may have been a far cry from hell, but the results, and even enduring the pain, would be worth it. At 2 o'clock, just under three hours after I'd sat in the chair that morning, I stood up with a gorgeous new addition to my ink collection. I checked it in the mirror and couldn't stop grinning, and both Shaun and Clair, who'd come back into the studio, seemed really pleased with it. Shaun took a couple of photos, wrapped me up with cling film and that was that.
The week following that initial session was a rather painful one. I've had biggish tattoos before, but never in a place that moves around so much, and I really felt each and every movement I made that week. Raising my arm was almost impossible for the first few days, and putting on or taking off my bra was incredibly painful. I was also really worried about knocking the tattoo in case I pulled off a scab and ruined it. I've also never had a tattoo that bruised before, so spent a couple of days with lovely greeny-yellow bruises over my arms. Thankfully though, it seemed to heal very well, getting to the itchy phase within a few days (staying the for what felt like eons) until one morning I woke up and it was totally smooth and looked perfect.
Given the amount of blackwork on the tattoo there are surprisingly few areas that will need to be touched up. The raven, I think, will need going over again, and the ink looks like it's bled a bit around the roots, but I actually like that and it's given the tattoo a very organic, realistic, look.
The tattoo about two hours after getting it done.
The reactions I've had to the tattoo have been nothing but positive. I thought my family would have something negative to say about it, but other than a "You've been mutilating yourself again," from my stepfather (which really upset me given my previous history and the meaning this tattoo has for me) they were really impressed with the work.
I've turned a few heads since getting this tattoo, both on the streets of Bath and among my friends, and everyone has been amazed by the detail Shaun's managed to get in the tattoo. I've got another appointment booked for the start of October to get the background coloured in, though I do really like the tattoo the way it is now it almost seems like a shame to colour it in and lose the pure black and white, but I know it won't be properly finished until it's coloured, and I can't wait to see it when it's finished.
The tattoo, fully healed.